The Swedish Language

While being abroad a lot you realize that your own culture isn’t as normal as you once thought. Just as you think that other people do weird stuff, speak funny or are simply being strange, I promise you: They think the same about you. Here are some reflections re the Swedish Language, (written by an English guy), apparently Swedish & Swedes Just crack people up.

The Swedish language:

’Hej’ - the word for hello and good-bye is the same. It’s difficult to know whether people are coming or going.
’Gift’ - the word for married is the same word as for poison. This probably could explain the high divorce rate.
’Sex’ - the word for six is the same as for sex, which gives ’six-pack’ a whole new meaning.
’Oväder’ - the word for stormy weather is, literally translated, ’unweather’. And I would have thought it was very much weather.
’Sambo’ - you live and sleep together with your partner but are not married, well at least not to that particular partner.
’Särbo’ - you sleep with your partner and then go home to your own bed afterwards.
’A-laget’ - in Swedish, the ’A-team’ is a group of hopeless alcoholics hanging outside the state liquor store. Not the kind you’d want in the national basketball team in other words.
’Osvensk’ - the word ’un-Swedish’ mostly has a positive connotation! A recent book review stated ’It’s an exciting thriller, entertaining, has colorful characters, lots of action and imagination and very un-Swedish to name but a few positive qualities’. It’s unbelievable, but true! Can you imagine a Frenchman using the word ’un-French’ as a positive quality?

Swedish English (Swenglish)

Although the Swedes generally have a very good command of the english language, sometimes they just don’t get it right.
’Please take off your clothes and follow me to the whip room.’(Translation: May I take your coat and accompany you to the VIP room)
’She’s away with the VD.’(Translation: She’s away with the Managing Director) (VD =Managing Director)
’His name is Öberg, a zero with two pricks.’(Translation: The letter ’o’ with two dots = ö) (pricks = dots)
’You’ll have to show your leg before entering’(Translation: You’ll have to show identification before entering.) (leg = id)
’Please keep hanging on the line’(Translation: Please continue to hold the line)
’Thank you for the last time’(Translation: Thank you for your hospitality.)
’Can I follow you to the big mess in Stockholm?’(Translation: May I come with you to the large fair in Stockholm?) (mässa = fair )
’He has many balls up in the air’(Translation: He is involved in many different projects.) (att ha bollar i luften = Swedish saying)

A lesson in Swedish

The Swede is a person of few words:

Eng: Excuse me, I didn’t quite catch what you were saying.Swe: Va? (vah?)Literal translation: What?
Eng: Sorry for bumping into you like that. So terribly clumsy of me.Swe: Oj! (oi!)Literal translation: Oh!
Eng: It’s you! How lovely to see you!Swe: Nej, men! (nay men)Literal translation: No, but!
Eng: How are things with you?Swe: Annars? (an ass)Literal translation: Otherwise?
Eng: Excuse me, may I disturb you for a second?Swe: Du Literal translation: You
Eng: Could I have a pint of your best bitter please.Swe: En stor stark Literal translation: A big strong one
Eng: Shall we treat ourselves and indulge in a schnapps?Swe: En liten djävul? (en liten yayvull)Literal translation: A little devil?

However sometimes English is just that bit more concise:

Eng: Mind the gap!Swe: Tänk på avståndet mellan vagn och plattform när ni stiger av.Literal translation: Think of the gap between the carriage and the plattform when you alight.